Tonight I spoke w/my friend Evan. He is planning a wedding this upcoming October as well, the weekend directly after ours. He & I exchanged our wedding-planning frustrations, with key emphasis on the unfathomable amounts of over-priced wedding effects. He threw out the amount of the location fee ALONE for his beach-hotel wedding, but mentioned that his fiance’s dream was only made possible due to the loving support of her family.

My heart sank. It shouldn’t have (necessarily) but it did.

I’m well aware that I am one blessed lady. I have a mother, amongst mothers. I have friends who I would take w/me throughout place and time. I’ve had a family full of innovative, colorful and unique characters. I have a sister who is as supportive as a protective lion. I have the cutest nephew in the world. Lastly, I have a significant other who God himself hand-picked for me. He is dashing, he is intelligent, he is fiercely loyal, he is spiritual, & most importantly, he gives his entire heart, soul and being to me. I am blessed. However I can’t help but feel the void of emptiness that swells in my heart when I reflect on my father’s staunch rejection of my wedding idea (due to the oh-so-shocking vegan menu). This translates to me feeling a direct renunciation of who I am at the very core.

Of course I’m sure he sees it (aloofly) differently. From his point of view, he offered to pay for the wedding, & only withdrew his support when he learned that I desired to have a celebration which would celebrate (my heart, my beliefs, my business, my lifestyle) my choice to serve a menu sans the meat.  Sounds fair, no? Especially from an old-school point of view.

However when one considers the “new-school”, when one considers the plight of the underdog (literal and figurative!) it seems to me unthinkable to not respect the deepest heartfelt desires of the couple celebrating the event. In fact, to put on a ceremony with elements in direct opposition to the bride (and groom’s) actual desires seems oddly in opposition to respecting who they are (or at least, in this case, who I am, since I’m the vegan) as a PERSON. Perhaps my view on this is what causes me to feel this personal undermine as a human being (and daughter), but this is how I feel. So tonight, I cried. I cried for myself, and I cried for every little girl who feels just short of her father’s validation. I cried for the recent deaths in the world, for the overpriced eco-friendly but not wallet friendly invitations. I cried for the closed minds that shut out progress. I cried for the mindset that causes us all to overspend, under think, forget to understand, but remember to under appreciate. I cried in a melodramatic, self-pitying, tired, sleep deprived, bridal kind of way. I then wrote these words to you, felt a little better, and proceeded to find these vegan shoes online for less than $40, (would these be cute for a rehearsal dinner or maybe even wedding shoe with the right dress, or??) and realized, that with cute cruelty-free shoes, a dose of Oprah, and maybe the right attitude, all could be right in the world again…

Vegan Shoes Under $40! Courtesy of Veganchic.com

Vegan Chic does it again under $40!

Is there any hurt a cute vegan shoe can't cure? $37.50 VeganChic.com

Still up next: The necessity of sane, sound wedding planning!